So… I’ve never been engaged before. And naturally, when you do something you’ve never done, whether it be get married, have kids, take a vacation, etc. you resort to the internet for answers.
I started doing Google searches for:
- How long of an engagement should I have?
- Should I have an engagement party? Where? Who? When?
- How many venues should I look at?
- How do I pick a date?
- How often should I get my ring cleaned?
…just to name A FEW!
I’ve been engaged for about 6 months & I still have awhile to go, but here are my top tips for what to do/not do when you first get engaged & are trying to figure it all out:
- Enjoy the Moment – First & foremost, don’t feel pressure to start planning right away (unless of course you want to!). Take a month or a dedicated amount of time to just enjoy being engaged and spreading the news. There will be plenty of time for planning and decision-making, but now you get to just drink champagne & enjoy one of the most exciting moments of your life!
- Get Yourself Organized – When you’re ready, get yourself a planner/organizer. You might not start using it yet, but there are some really helpful ones out there (I recommend this one from The Knot) that will help you figure out what to do and when to do it. This will serve as a guide for you to use along the way & will feel a little less overwhelming!
- Consult Your Crew – Bounce YOUR ideas off of your friends & family! Be careful with this, though, because people sometimes like to make things about them. If you find that people aren’t supportive of your ideas, aren’t being particularly helpful, or are making your engagement about what they would like/want, take a step back and re-consider consulting them in the future. Also keep in mind that sometimes people just need to be told what you need — whether it’s someone to listen, someone to help you brainstorm ideas, or someone to give you feedback or advice, make sure you make your needs & expectations known so that people can either meet you where you’re at or let it be known that they can’t.
- Use the Internet Wisely – The Internet can be helpful, but it can also be overwhelming. You will find tons of advice that contradicts other advice. You will find an endless amount of ideas that you love that conflict and make it near impossible to make a decision. You will come across people that have strong opinions and tell you why you should do something and/or why you should not. Use the Internet as a GUIDE, but if you find yourself feeling stressed out when looking at Pintrest or reading wedding planning forums, take a step back and lean on tip #5.
- Trust Your Instincts – Sometimes we have an idea that gets lost in the fear of what other people will think of it or ruled out because it’s unconventional. This event is about you & your significant other and every part of it should flow from that, regardless of what other people might think or say. Make sure that you are constantly checking in with yourself & your partner throughout this process and being true to yourselves as a couple. Advice and ideas can be incredibly helpful, especially when you feel stuck, but use them as a resource and not as a rule.
What do you think? Are there any I missed?! I’d love to hear about your experience as a newly engaged woman & learn what has been most helpful to you in the comment section below!